When you start believing

Hey, pretty one.

I was thinking the other night.

So we have this concrete expectations about concrete persons, like best friends should appreciate us, parents should understand, and so on, but in the real life, nothing happens the way we want it, and the more we expect the more we suffer. And I’m not telling you that parents will never understand but I’m telling to hope for it, to look forward it. When we stop looking forward but start expecting we stop trying and doing our best.

Life is not predictable. So live it like you believe in your own ways to make a better tomorrow. Live and look forward to all the beautiful things that destiny has in mind for you.

For a friend

Hey, You.

I just want you to know that you can relay on me. I know I’m hell of a person to live with, but you should know that I’ll always be there for you. You can call me in 4 a.m. and I won’t be mad. I won’t criticize you over the decisions you make, but I’ll give you my piece of an advice when I’ll think that that’s what you need to hear. I’ll be your crying shoulder whenever you need, and I’ll be there when you need to talk or just someone to sit with.

Maybe I won't be the light

In the end of your tunnel,

But I assure you - I’ll be there

I'll make you laugh,

I'll make you smile.

That's a promise.

I shouldn't be here

Hello, again.

It was one of those days when heart beats stronger then you'd like.

He had a birthday today. 18 years old. That's big don't ya thing? So we were in this full-of-drunk-sex-wanting party and we seated him on a chair and the boys threw him 18 times in the air. He flew, damn how he flew, and all this time I could only think about the fact, that what if God sees him now? I don't want him gone, not now, not ever, even if heaven is missing an angel.

Songs are what makes me remember

Hey, pretty one.

It amazes me how you can say such a stupid things with a straight face. You are my Kakashi not being sensei way at all.

I heard a song yesterday. Artist I have never heard before, voice like an angel, and she sang about you.

"Dark eyes and careless hair,

But too cool to care.

You took your coat off,

Stood in the rain,

You're always crazy like that. "

Or maybe she didn't sing about you at all.

I wish you

Hey, you.

Today is Christmas evening and I don't know how it is in your country, but in mine, we celebrate and open gifts exactly in Christmas eve. I guess we - as a nation - aren't so patient to wait till Christmas morning. I know I'm totally not XD

So you may find it pretty funny, but my mom and dad have bought exactly the same gift for each other. I really never thought that could be possible, `cause, first of all, I always am in the middle, with mother thinking about present for father and the other way around. But this year, mother thought it was funny to surprise me along dad. It all would be very good, if she hadn't told me yesterday what she bought. I just couldn't stop smiling as she was telling about the prize of the disc i had in my bag, just bought with my father. I just really want to see their faces. I just really hope they will laugh it off, you know - not to be sad about the spent money, but just be amazed with the coincidence. Because i so want a peaceful Christmas.

This is the first year in long time, I don't have the Christmas feeling. Although I hope it might change. But, yes, this year, I have the most beautiful Christmas tree ever. I would show it to you, but this time I wish to keep it just mine.

Yesterday was slowing all day long, so today the ground is in lovely white color. I love white Cristmas. White is a beginning. It always had been for me.

Well, oh, I guess this is it. I wish you a happy Christmas. Make them in something more than just gifts and drinks. Make this year for something to remember.

With love

Evita

Memories

Hey, pretty one.

People so often want to go back to some past memory, they are not even looking forward the ones that are waiting for us around the next corner.

So, please, try not to collide into anyone fragile.

*me

Hey, dad

Hey, Dad.

Maybe I'm not as clever or pretty as you think, but in the inside, I'm just as you. Only for me there is tons of decissions a haven't still made, and I promise you I'll do all the right things were you did the wrongs, `cause I know how you are. I love you, you are an amazing person, but you are suffocating me till death.

With love, your daughter.

My hands are shaking, but the letters are still found

I used to write a lot. Each day, each week I had a pencil in my hand and a paper always with me.

A year ago I stopped. God, that had been a miserable year. Even if you can fool every one else, there is no chance on fooling yourself in a long period, and I have to admit I really missed my `writing` time. When you have pencil in your hand and blank page in front of you, in your head there is thousands and thousand little thoughts trying to gain your attention. In a blank page you can find hope, dreams and so much more. you just have to let your mind be free.

Well, know I have finally bagan again putting my thoughts on paper. But there still isn't anything like before, there is no romance on 400 pages, no joke stories about me and my friends. No, I have just started to write a letters. For my friends, my parents, but mostly for you.

Iif you have found me, if you have read me, you have made me a bit more happier.

This is just the beginning.